One Word for 2011

ONEWORD

It’s tradition: at the end of every year, I take the time to think through what I hope and expect the next to be like. Sometimes it’s a word, or a phrase, but it’s always something.

A couple of weeks ago, some Nashville friends of mine challenged me and others to come up with just one word for 2011 (#oneword2011 on Facebook and Twitter). So I did:

Excellence.

Some of the characteristics of excellence are time, effort, saying no, focus, commitment, intentionality, and the like. It’s not that I don’t already practice these disciplines, it’s just that I have a tendancy to compromise them for the “opportunity” of something new…different…more interesting.

I recently heard someone say…

If the grass is greener on the other side, try watering your own.

I think I’ll do just that.

What’s your one word for 2011?

Join the #OneWord2011 Community

This space…

See this space?

It’s blank. Wide open. Full of potential.

These words can help. Hurt. Direct. Communicate. Distract. Make you laugh…maybe.

What’s important isn’t what it is, but what it will become.

I We own you blank spaces. You will become our art.

Talking: A Lesson in Courtesy

We have a house full of Invisible Children Roadies [video]: Four American’s and two Ugandans.

Yesterday, Grace, one of the Ugandans, was speaking in front a crowd of rowdy high schoolers. Gracefully, she said…

“In Africa, I was taught to never speak when someone else is speaking. So I will be quiet until you are done talking, then I’ll continue.”

A quiet hush came over the audience.

Grace resumed her story.

It’s not that we live in a culture where people constantly talk over each other, although they do. I’m convinced that most of the talking happens inside our heads, while someone is talking.

What?

Exactly.

Insecurity.

Insecurity is my number one deterrent from achieving my potential. Therefore, I fear my potential frequently.

What do you fear?

In limbo…

Towing the Mustang

And no, this isn’t about the movie Inception—although it could be if this next post is really about a dream.

It’s official. I’m a Charlottean.

This past Saturday, I arrived in the Queen City after a beautiful drive over the Smokey Mountains from Nashville. As you can see, I had my first car in tow. It’s a 1968 Mustang Fastback that I’m proud to say has been a family car since it came off the lot. My grandfather bought it (I have the original sales invoice for it still), my parents dated in it and I’ve had it since 1991. But I digress.

The plan was to arrive in Charlotte and unload our new house while Kristy and the kids drove over from Nashville to arrive to a half-way unpacked house.

As of today, Monday, I’m staying in a hotel in Charlotte and my wife and kids are in Nashville waiting for me to call with good news.

We’re in limbo…

To be honest, I am not genetically created to like out-of-my-control situations (just being honest).

Since arriving, I’ve looked at exactly 10 more rental houses, on top of the 20 or so that I’ve seen on previous trips. I’ve pursued four homes, only to have them be too expensive, rented or mysteriously unavailable. Also, it turns out that 90lb labs are an issue too.

We’re in limbo…and I’m still not really liking it.

Yet, strangely, I am.

There’s something about this process that is frustrating, yet fulfilling all at the same time. While I’m very much in the middle of my transition, here are three things that I’m holding onto for dear life right now:

  1. Change, really is fun!
    Think about it, you can either get mad, worry, be full of anxiety, or, do your best and trust that it will work out—because it will.
  2. It’s not what you think it should be
    This can be the most frustrating because we spend a lot of time crafting the perfect change, only to realize that what we think change will look like, and what it will really be, is two different things. It’s best to plan really well, and be faithful to walk with one foot in front of the other—no matter what comes your way.
  3. Don’t get distracted
    This is the most dangerous of them all because it can come in many, unexpected forms: self-pity, lingering in the frustrations and doubt, just to name a few. Here, you begin to second guess a lot. If you’re here, do what you can to find the off-ramp and fast.

Nobody is perfect at change and embracing it looks different for everybody. Personally, I claim to really like it, which is me believing #1. I “really like it” because of the unpredictability of #2, which is ultimately supposed to be about #1. But right now, I’m looking for off ramps.

The reality is, in the next few days, or even in the next couple of weeks (#2), my family will be settled (#1) in our new home here in Charlotte and the difficulties of this change will begin to subside. I only hope that next time, I’ll remember these days and strive to fully embrace change. After all, it really is fun.

Why do you write?

Inspired by a recent post from one of my unintentional mentors, Michael Hyatt, I thought I’d write something personal and offer a peek into why I write in this space.

Most papers I wrote in school were plagued with red marks and the reoccurring phrase: “awkward sentence.” In fact, that statement was used so much that I have screenshots of the squiggly line with the words written above, etched into my memory. No matter how hard I’ve tried, they won’t go away.

Over the years, I’ve taken the criticism I’ve received of my writings to heart. Essentially, all of critiques, well intended or not, reinforced what I had already been told—I write awkwardly. Since the word “awkward” is never used to exemplify a positive experience, it’s not hard to imagine that this repetition had negative effects on my desire to write. It didn’t matter what it was for, I accepted the reality that I was a “bad writer” and that got me out of writing pretty much anything of importance. After all, who wants the “bad writer” to take lead on a group project or advertising copy? Me either.

In college, I confided with one of my professors that I was really struggling in his class. He asked me a handful of questions and promptly diagnosed me with a “learning disorder.” Immediately afterward, he stated that his wife dealt with these kinds of “issues” and that gave him the moral authority to diagnose me. Great, so not only am I a bad writer, but now I have a learning disorder. No wonder my motto in college was “C’s get degrees.” I was convinced.

It’s only been in the past five-to-six years that I’ve dared to challenging these, and other voices. Before then, these people represented the authority and no matter what I thought, they were right. So, when teachers told me I couldn’t write or worse yet, that I have a learning disability, I believed them. As much as I didn’t want to, I did, I have and to some degree, I still do.

So, why do I write this blog?

As much as I would like to say that I write to become a “Tribe” leader, grow a following or boost my stats, it’s not like that for me. Sure, I get distracted by those ambitions, but at the end of the day, I write to silence the voices and the resistance. I write to prove to myself that I’m not a bad writer. I write to, in some ways, prove to my teachers that they were and are wrong.

Seth Godin has been one of the primary catalysts in helping me re-evaluate the things that have impacted my life the most. To be honest, this has given me an incredible amount of permission to challenge the voices and systems that have shaped who I am to this day. What I am finding is, it’s not that they were totally wrong, but they weren’t entirely right.

Why do you write?

Fresh Ideas

Thinking and creating is the majority of what most of us do.

The truth is, it takes as much time to think of something fresh, as it does to think of something stale.

Which one do you prefer?

Which one do you get excited about?

Which one do you share with friends, colleagues and family members?

I don’t know about you, but with the invention of the internet, I see and hear about a lot of ideas.

Most of them are stale. Very few are fresh.

So how do you know if your idea is fresh? People will say things like…

“Finally!”  or ”I wish I thought of that!”

If you’re going to put the time and energy into creating something new, make sure it’s fresh, but most of all, remember this:

Nobody else can bring what you have to the table. You are unique. You are one-0f-a-kind and your perspective and creativity only rivals your own. Own it. Dig deep, be diligent to deliver fresh ideas. It’s just more fun.

Just because their butt is in a seat, doesn’t mean you’ll get results

Company cultures aren’t entirely driven by it’s leader. You have to look deeper into how the leader has been trained. These paradigms have often been set for a long time and were often heavily influenced by parents, previous managers and probably the most influential, age.

If you’re company puts a significant value on whether you’re on time, working your hours and sitting in your seat—not talking, checking Facebook, making coffee—you name it, there’s a good chance your company is managed based on the industrial revolution management style. In short, this style is based on managing factory workers. Each worker has a specific role. If you weren’t in your seat, you weren’t producing. Low producers get fired. High producers get rewarded. It’s easy to see how working long hours is an indicator of a hard worker. Hardly.

While this is just one style of management, it happens to be the one in which I believe that most companies operate from. These paradigms aren’t inherently good or bad. In fact, if it’s all the boss or owner knows, then at the foundation it’s true and accordingly, good. The problem is, with every new generation that enters the workforce, corporate cultures are faced with new challenges—or what I would like to offer as opportunities. What worked in and with a previous generation, will not work today.

In the book, The Five Love Languages (Amazon), author Gary Chapman, introduces the theory that people receive and give love differently: acts of service, quality time, receiving gifts, words of affirmation and physical touch. He claims that if we strive to understand how people around us receive love, we will be far more effective in making people feel loved. Using management as our framework, it’s easy to see how the industrial manager would conflict with the gen-y manager. More often than not, each feels misunderstood and oftentimes rejected. It’s not that one is right and other is wrong. It’s that they just don’t work well together. They value different things.

There are scores of articles and books written on both of these management styles. I’ve listed a handful for your review below. If you’re wanting to get a head start, here are five ways that you can understand and maximize your gen-y workforce:

  1. Managing Gen-Y based on time and butts in the seat will not get you results. Set goals and base their success on results. This generation will work hard when asked.
  2. Remember that most jobs today don’t create widgets, they create mind work. This kind of work doesn’t have a beginning or end—it always is, so give them the flexibility to work when and where they are most creative. Your bottom line will thank you. Just ask Google.
  3. Life/Work integration is a significant issue to the Gen-Y workforce. They are more likely to want to work with you, not for you. Why? Freedom. If you can create a culture that allows life to happen, yet still have high expectations, your culture will always win. They’d rather get fired for not performing than being late.
  4. Social media and blogs are a part of life/work, so please, stop monitoring its consumption. Sure, this would mean that people may spend too much time here, but if you’re doing #1, you won’t have a problem.
  5. Perhaps the most important of the five is that this generation wants to be heard. They do not expect you to act on all or any of their ideas. They just want to know that you understand their perspective and opinions.

While this list represents five ways you can start today, there are many more. If you’re a twenty or thirtysomething reading this post, I invite you to leave a contribution. Tell us your opinion about this generational management dance. If we, the generation, want to be understood, being heard is the first step.

Research

If you’re like me, you might be reading this saying, “nice theory, but how do you know this? Show me the proof!” Good point. Here are a handful of articles to get you started. There are scores more.

Management is Still Fighting the Industrial Revolution
Excerpt: Management was originally invented to solve two problems: the first—getting semiskilled employees to perform repetitive activities competently, diligently, and efficiently; the second—coordinating those efforts in ways that enabled complex goods and services to be produced in large quantities. In a nutshell, the problems were efficiency and scale, and the solution was bureaucracy, with its hierarchical structure, cascading goals, precise role definitions, and elaborate rules and procedures.

Moon Shots for Management (Harvard Business Review)

What Millennials Want (Wired Magazine)

The Millennial’s Are Coming – 60 Minutes
Great Quote: Faced with new employees who want to roll into work with their iPods and flip flops around noon, but still be CEO by Friday, companies are realizing that the era of the buttoned down exec happy to have a job is as dead as the three-Martini lunch. … “The boomers do need to hear the message, that they’re gonna have to start focusing more on coaching rather than bossing. If this generation in particular, you just tell them, ‘You got to do this. You got to do this. You got to do this.’ They truly will walk. And every major law firm, every major company knows, this is the future,” Crane explains.

Millennials in the workplace do not agree with the work ethic standards of past generations
Interesting: Millennials in the workplace actually expanded on the Gen X foundation of casual Fridays to not only make everyday casual but to further show that how they dress is an extension of their individualism. While Gen X or boomers see this as sloppy, the millennial generation views their dress as freedom of expression in color and style and furthermore, as an extension of how they speak.

Do you want to be the boss, or the leader?

I ran across this quote the other day and it struck a chord with me. Perhaps it will with you too.

The boss drives group members; the leader coaches them.
The boss depends upon authority; the leader on good will.
The boss inspires fear; the leader inspires enthusiasm.
The boss says ‘I’; the leader says ‘we.’
The boss assigns the task, the leader sets the pace.
The boss says, ‘Get there on time’; the leader gets there ahead of time.
The boss fixes the blame for the breakdown; the leader fixes the breakdown.
The boss knows how it is done; the leader shows how.
The boss makes work a drudgery; the leader makes it a game.
The boss says, ‘Go’; the leader says, ‘Let’s go.’
– Author unknown