Change | Kyle Chowning

And no, this isn’t about the movie Inception—although it could be if this next post is really about a dream.

It’s official. I’m a Charlottean.

This past Saturday, I arrived in the Queen City after a beautiful drive over the Smokey Mountains from Nashville. As you can see, I had my first car in tow. It’s a 1968 Mustang Fastback that I’m proud to say has been a family car since it came off the lot. My grandfather bought it (I have the original sales invoice for it still), my parents dated in it and I’ve had it since 1991. But I digress.

The plan was to arrive in Charlotte and unload our new house while Kristy and the kids drove over from Nashville to arrive to a half-way unpacked house.

As of today, Monday, I’m staying in a hotel in Charlotte and my wife and kids are in Nashville waiting for me to call with good news.

We’re in limbo…

To be honest, I am not genetically created to like out-of-my-control situations (just being honest).

Since arriving, I’ve looked at exactly 10 more rental houses, on top of the 20 or so that I’ve seen on previous trips. I’ve pursued four homes, only to have them be too expensive, rented or mysteriously unavailable. Also, it turns out that 90lb labs are an issue too.

We’re in limbo…and I’m still not really liking it.

Yet, strangely, I am.

There’s something about this process that is frustrating, yet fulfilling all at the same time. While I’m very much in the middle of my transition, here are three things that I’m holding onto for dear life right now:

Change, really is fun!
Think about it, you can either get mad, worry, be full of anxiety, or, do your best and trust that it will work out—because it will.
It’s not what you think it should be
This can be the most frustrating because we spend a lot of time crafting the perfect change, only to realize that what we think change will look like, and what it will really be, is two different things. It’s best to plan really well, and be faithful to walk with one foot in front of the other—no matter what comes your way.
Don’t get distracted
This is the most dangerous of them all because it can come in many, unexpected forms: self-pity, lingering in the frustrations and doubt, just to name a few. Here, you begin to second guess a lot. If you’re here, do what you can to find the off-ramp and fast.

Nobody is perfect at change and embracing it looks different for everybody. Personally, I claim to really like it, which is me believing #1. I “really like it” because of the unpredictability of #2, which is ultimately supposed to be about #1. But right now, I’m looking for off ramps.

The reality is, in the next few days, or even in the next couple of weeks (#2), my family will be settled (#1) in our new home here in Charlotte and the difficulties of this change will begin to subside. I only hope that next time, I’ll remember these days and strive to fully embrace change. After all, it really is fun.

The Choice of Change

Remember when you went on a roller coaster for the first time? You stood in a line full of people who couldn’t wait to get on. Excitement dominated the air and the expectation of thrill was just around the corner. Your mind raced to wonder what it was going to be like. With every step closer, there was a collective increase in anticipation. People smiled. You smiled back. You talked about what it was going to be like; giddy like you just ate 10 donuts.

As you got closer to the end, you’re presented an opportunity; where to sit? It’s not as if there is a bad seat on the ride. It’s a matter of which perspective do you want to have? Is it best to sit in the very front? Or the very back? Either way, those are prime seats and you’re gonna have to wait in line a little longer. There’s something special about those seats. However, no less fun are the seats in between. In fact, no matter where you sit, you still get to experience the thrill of the ride.

Yet, for some the ride will be terrifying. The rider alone, interprets the experience.

This, is what change is like.

If you want the best, you’ll have to wait a little longer than others. Those opportunities are in high demand and they require a sacrifice to get to them.

If you want to get on the ride, you can and you’ll have to wait, but not as long. It’s still a fun ride and you’ll have a blast.

Then, there’s the experience of the ride. You have two choices:

1) Throw your hands up at every drop, scream like a little kid and run to the back of the line to do it again.

2) You embrace the fear of the ride where every drop, loop and corner is absolutely terrifying and you’ll walk away hating it and never wanting to ride again.

Your choice. The ride is perfectly safe. It’s up to you to decide if it’s thrilling or terrifying.

Herein lies the crossroad in which change is embraced or rejected.

What will you decide?