In limbo…

And no, this isn’t about the movie Inception—although it could be if this next post is really about a dream.

It’s official. I’m a Charlottean.

This past Saturday, I arrived in the Queen City after a beautiful drive over the Smokey Mountains from Nashville. As you can see, I had my first car in tow. It’s a 1968 Mustang Fastback that I’m proud to say has been a family car since it came off the lot. My grandfather bought it (I have the original sales invoice for it still), my parents dated in it and I’ve had it since 1991. But I digress.

The plan was to arrive in Charlotte and unload our new house while Kristy and the kids drove over from Nashville to arrive to a half-way unpacked house.

As of today, Monday, I’m staying in a hotel in Charlotte and my wife and kids are in Nashville waiting for me to call with good news.

We’re in limbo…

To be honest, I am not genetically created to like out-of-my-control situations (just being honest).

Since arriving, I’ve looked at exactly 10 more rental houses, on top of the 20 or so that I’ve seen on previous trips. I’ve pursued four homes, only to have them be too expensive, rented or mysteriously unavailable. Also, it turns out that 90lb labs are an issue too.

We’re in limbo…and I’m still not really liking it.

Yet, strangely, I am.

There’s something about this process that is frustrating, yet fulfilling all at the same time. While I’m very much in the middle of my transition, here are three things that I’m holding onto for dear life right now:

  1. Change, really is fun!
    Think about it, you can either get mad, worry, be full of anxiety, or, do your best and trust that it will work out—because it will.
  2. It’s not what you think it should be
    This can be the most frustrating because we spend a lot of time crafting the perfect change, only to realize that what we think change will look like, and what it will really be, is two different things. It’s best to plan really well, and be faithful to walk with one foot in front of the other—no matter what comes your way.
  3. Don’t get distracted
    This is the most dangerous of them all because it can come in many, unexpected forms: self-pity, lingering in the frustrations and doubt, just to name a few. Here, you begin to second guess a lot. If you’re here, do what you can to find the off-ramp and fast.

Nobody is perfect at change and embracing it looks different for everybody. Personally, I claim to really like it, which is me believing #1. I “really like it” because of the unpredictability of #2, which is ultimately supposed to be about #1. But right now, I’m looking for off ramps.

The reality is, in the next few days, or even in the next couple of weeks (#2), my family will be settled (#1) in our new home here in Charlotte and the difficulties of this change will begin to subside. I only hope that next time, I’ll remember these days and strive to fully embrace change. After all, it really is fun.

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  • Lori Mahon

    We are praying for you all in this time of "limbo" – it will all work out and you'll look back as you said and embrace the next time.

    P.S. Love that you have that Mustang! I come from a Mustang family myself — my brother restored a 66 Mustang and my first car was a 1969 Mustang Convertible. I was very sad to see that car sold after I went to college and wish I had it back — so glad you have your family history!

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/lightchild Grant Jenkins

    Bro, I can relate to all of this 100%. I have so been there and, in many ways, am there right now. I have learned so many of these things and continue to. I've spent my fair share of time in "limbo" seasons, the current one being the most significant and purposeful. While the road certainly doesn't look anything like what I would have written for myself, I can't imagine a more exciting and uncertain story for my life.

    The perspective gained while "in the middle" is priceless and I love what you have shared here. These are hard lessons but they are incredibly valuable. I am definitely praying for you and your family as you walk this transition out.